Scatmania

I’m actually impressed. My friend Andy’s finally put some songs online, and he’s really good (for one reason or another, I’d never heard anything of his before, and I’m much impressed - for some reason I’d come to the assumption that he’d be shit). Anyway - so long as you’re willing to put up with the (pretty crappy) recordings he’s put online, go listen to B.O.A.T.S. and Straight To Video (and Kofi Annan TV, if you can put up with bad MP3 quality). Then leave him some feedback.

In other news, have made a few minor improvements to Abnib: mostly to better highlight upcoming Troma Night events. On which note - this Saturday is Troma Night 50 - “Return To Firetop Mountain” (well done to Matt for understanding the reference), which I’m much looking forward to.

Freshers’ Fayre was a success, as Kit reports. Although it must be said that he’s probably right to be concerned that this may be the last year we’re able to pull such a stunt. Which is a real shame. We worked really hard - harder than we ever do at the jobs from which we took a holiday just to make this possible - to sell burgers and hot dogs and bacon rolls and things to freshers, and we raised a considerable amount of money to donate to Aberystwyth Nightline.

On which note, both Claire and I sustained thumb injuries as a result of our efforts - see the picture! Mine was caused by sheer stupidity - picking up a hot pan I melted my thumb to the handle, and required a trip to A&E. Claire’s was caused by damn blind stupidity - while seperating two frozen burgers, she levered them apart using a bread knife, and in doing so took a large bite out of her thumb when the knife slipped.

On which note, what idiot decided that the Sports Centre’s emergency first aid kit should be stored behind a double-locked door to which nobody on site has either key? Our designated first-aider eventually had to run to his car and collect his own first aid kit in order to stop Claire’s bleeding. Had the injury been significantly more serious, we’d have gotten to a point of having to improvise a tourniquet to save her from bleeding to death while she waited next to the locked door. Ah well.

And there’s another thing - how could the union justify telling us that we couldn’t cook indoors because “no food or drink is allowed in the building”, forcing us to rent a generator and stand in the rain for hours on end, then allow Spartacus to sell sandwiches in the foyer… and then, better yet, let some of the clubs and societies give away beer to their members. The mind boggles.

I’ve had three days of meeting lots of 18-year-olds, fresh to the University, setting out for their degrees and away from home for the first time. I feel old again. =o)

But happy.

Well; it’s that time of the year again… the time of year that I sell hot dogs and burgers to Freshers at the Freshers’ Fayre [this time last year], alongside Kit, who’s visiting for that purpose.

This year, I think we’re better prepared materially - as in, we’ve made preparations for if it rains, we’ve got all the equipment ready to pick up, etc. - but I think we’re less well-prepared in other aspects: for example, we didn’t think about a cash float until yesterday. It’ll all be fine, of course - I’m working with a great team who’ll pull everything together no matter what, and this day - the first day of the fayre - is rarely as busy as the other two: giving us a chance to make any alterations to our plans. Nonetheless, I can’t help but feel a little bit apprehensive. Ah well.

Just. Plain. Wierd.

You know what’s become quite popular among the masses since the take-off of the Internet? Fantasy leagues. Yes; that’s right - those things previously reserved for pub regulars and geeky play-by-mail types. Now, the internet is full of Fantasy Sports Leagues, Fantasy Share Trading, and so on.

For those of you not in the know; when playing in a fantasy league you are allocated a number of points (frequently represented by pseudo-currency). These points can be spent on, for example, famous football players, or companies, or whatever, and as the perceieved values of these commodities change (e.g. the footballer scores more goals, or particpates in more winning matches… or the companies share value changes), the value of your team/portfolio adjusts accordingly. You can then sell the successful players or shares (ideally at their “market peak”) in order to finance the purchase of others, plus a small profit for yourself. Some fantasy leagues take this to it’s logical extreme, and actually play gambling for real money (with the values of the commodities scaled down by a factor to accomodate the wallets of the participants, of course - few people carry around enough spare cash to finance a premier league football team).

So; here’s my idea: Fantasy Terrorist League. It’s a web site where, once you’ve signed up an account, you’re given a number of ‘points’ which you can invest in the many terrorist organisations that are active the world over. The value of these terrorist groups decreases gradually over time, unless they get media attention. Value of groups goes up as they are featured in the news. Value of groups rises dramatically as they perform other acts: for example, taking a hostage might be worth 5 points per hostage taken (2 bonus points for a successful execution); detonating a car or truck bomb might be worth 10 points (with bonus points available for damaging foreign embassies); a toxic gas attack or biological terror might get a group’s value up by 15 points; a plane hijacking could increase a group’s value by 20 or 30 points. The points weightings will be variable, too, based on difficulty (it’s a lot more difficult now to hijack a plane than it used to be, apparently) and popularity (”Oh great; HAMAS did another suicide bombing… by the time the PLO get around to detonating one it’ll be worth nothing! I knew I should have invested in those Chechen rebels…”). Of course, I wouldn’t run such a site as a real gambling site (last thing I’d want is somebody with, how shall we put this - insider information - using it to gain a profit to support their activities), but I think it’d be a fascinating social experiment to run as a true “fantasy league”.

If you think this is in bad taste: fuck off. o_|/ It amused me for awhile when I thought of it.

The Official God FAQ attempts to answer all of the most frequently asked questions about God. Do you have questions about God? All will be answered.

Apparently, I’m Debian Linux (or possibly MacOS X). Sweet.

Which OS are You?

Geeky winnage! This evening I wrote a pair of applications enabling me to use my new Bluetooth-enabled mobile phone as a remote control for WinDVD, the DVD playing software I use on my computer.

Not just a geeky project, this is fuelled by a genuine need: every Troma Night, when the pizza arrives, we end up scrambling for the keyboard in order to pause the film, or I find myself wandering back and forwards, trying to set the volume to an audible-to-all but not-deafening level. With the aid of this new funky toy, I can do this from my seat. Toy.

I’m looking forward to other ideas for uses for this technology. Tools already exist to allow you to control your media player and PowerPoint presentations using a Bluetooth mobile phone, but I’m sure that there are more useful applications that I can use in order to improve my own, personal geeky life.

Toy.

My new mobile phone finally arrived at the weekend. I’ve texted my new number to everybody in my phone book, except for people I don’t want to have it <grins>. If you don’t have my new number, but you think you should, you have three options:

1. Use one of the online services in which my number will be recorded. If you know what these are and how to access them, you can get my new number for yourself.

2. Talk to somebody who already has my new number, or get it from me sometime (call me on my landline, e-mail me, ICQ me, whatever…). Easy.

3. If all else fails, leave a comment here and I’ll get back to you.

Tell me, have you seen the marvellous breadfish?